Voice in Writing Tips

Voice
I heard over and over in my fiction novel proposal rejection letters that I needed to work on my voice. But I never understood what they meant or where to find information on voice techniques. Recently I attended a writer's conference and learned a lot about voice. It finally made sense to me. I learned what I'd been doing wrong in my fiction. Why my non-fiction sold but my fiction didn't do so well, even if it did sell.
    Authoritative voice is the person telling the story, the narrator. It needs to have character in and of itself. This voice leads all the other voices. This is only needed in third-person. When you tell a story, there needs to be metaphors, similes and uniqueness, only to the narrator. It sets the tone and mood for the entire novel and stays similar in personality and style. The difference between voice and simply writing are dramatic.
      For example:  He walked out to the stream. . He looked out into the water. He ran into a dog. He looked at the sky and noticed it had stars and clouds.
       Here is an added authoritative voice to the story. There are countless ways to add your own unique voice. Here's an example:  The home-filled cabin went up in flames. The dark rain clouds revealed a blood-colored moon. The cold, menacing water turned red.
       Later on you can add the character's voice and point of view. ( Scott's relief washed over him as the water cleaned the blood of his cops uniform. so on so on.  Here you can narrow in on what the character is thinking. I'd assume he's a sociopath who just hurt someone and doesn't care. He wants to admire his handiwork. He is a cop so he is probably going to get away with his crime and keep on committing more. The authoritative voice sets the tone for the character and the plot.)
    Make your authoritative voice solid. If it is going to be British, keep it British. Is the story formal so should the voice be. Is the story a comedy, then keep the tone light and humorous.
    The point of view character needs to assimilate well with the authoritative voice, yet it has to be different.
    In first-person the character voice takes the lead. What one character says has to be unique to only that character. So the main point of view character has to talk in a way that none of the other characters would talk. What they say can't fit easily into other characters. A hillbilly doesn't sound the same as a teenage New Yorker girl. Obviously. 
     Let me know if you have anything to add below or anything you can recommend for me to learn more about voice. I still have a long ways to go.
Thank you for reading.

A Near Death Experience Changed Me

 Rachelle Graham as told to by Billy Monteo (last name was changed to protect to privacy)

 Billy grew up in troubled times in an environment where gangs were more common than after-school activities. Guns were easier to find than brand new textbooks. Crimes were broken and nothing near as innocent as truancy.

     He wasn’t blessed with a conscience. That gift wasn’t on his short list. He was also dirt poor.  Whatever remorse he felt was buried deep. If he had had any money to go to a psychologist, a diagnosis of antisocial personality or sociopath would be fitting. He didn’t care. Nothing mattered to him, except maybe a cold brew, money and a cute girl.

   Billy spent his time with people who robbed cars and stereos and stores like they were entitled. Nothing was too far for him, even shooting at opposing gangs while innocent people’s lives were in the cross hairs. He swears now he never killed anyone. But maybe that was what he needed to tell himself in order to feel content with his life now. A life way different than the one he was brought up in.

   When Billy was in his twenties he slit his wrists. The tub was full of blood and he was drunk as can be. Still, he remembered the pain was intense. Nothing was going to stop him from cutting, he said. Severe depression was also on his short list. He wanted no more pain.  

     His heart was officially dead long enough for him to have the experience of his life. An experience which changed his life and gave him something he may or may not have been born with. It took losing his heart to gain one.

     He drifted away from his body as his last rites were being read over the sheet placed over his body. “By the Blood of the cross forgive his/her sins and failings. Remember the faith of those who mourn.”

     A guide led him to an unpleasant place by way of a downward tunnel.  He described this place as hell. Spirits were reaching out to him and throwing things at him, trying to get his attention. They were there to better themselves but were moving at a slow pace. They wanted his help. They wanted a chance to go back and change their time on Earth.

    He was brought out of hell and into the light, where Jesus or a being of light showed him many things. His life review, the pain he’d caused others and the pain he’d caused himself. He also saw the world from the beginning to the end. To him, the experience was hard to remember.

     A few other being of light appeared, standing next to Jesus. They were debating whether he would get another chance on Earth to prove himself.  The area was warm, safe and protected. Everything was so light he wondered why he didn’t need sunglasses. Everyone communicated telepathically and he could feel immense unconditional love and forgiveness radiated from everyone.  He didn’t want to go anywhere. He wanted to stay there forever, he’d never been happier.

    A being of light he said was God telepathically responded, “He is one of my favorite spirits. We need to let him go down to make things better.”                                                          

     Another being of light disagreed. “He didn’t quite make the cut. He needs to go to hell.” They both looked at him and searched for the answers. The brass machine in the middle of the room wasn’t facing up. It was facing down.

   Billy begged for the chance to go back and make things right. He wanted to stay right where he was. But that was not an option. It was made clear to him all the good he could do on this world if he came back.  

     So the decision was finally made. He would go back and try again. He would learn remorse and guilt. He would learn to put people first. And he’d use his religion to help him help others. He was eager to go back and prove himself. Within minutes, he was back in his body.

   Billy knows he’s still far from perfect, but he understands empathy and compassion. His feelings shut off in his past were turned back on. He now has a heart that feels guilt and can love with real human compassion.

     When he came back alive, his family and priest looked at him as if he was Lazarus. When people were read their last rite that was it they were gone. The priest had never seen someone come back before.

     He now stays away from guns, gangs and narcissistic behavior. He’s close to his family and is good to his friends. Billy now has a pet who loves him because he is kind and caring to him. He’s written a novel to help those who are ostracized because they weren’t born the same way. The book may go against his catholic upbringing, but he knows treating people the same and as if they all matter is what the people in his near-death experience taught him.    

   Billy is not afraid of death, far from it. He welcomes it. He’s also not afraid of hell. It was painful but he knows it is a place for people to get better.

   Lack of conscience may be a permanent challenge for some, but for Billy it wasn’t.

   As someone who suffered from severe depression for many years, he is now getting his footing back. He hasn’t tried to kill himself in years and is in recovery. He now faithfully takes his medication and attends therapy. He learned to not only love others but how best to love himself. One of the most important lessons he learned from his experience was how valuable love was.